Being a parent to a new baby is really hard. When your basic needs like eating, peeing, showering, and sleeping are being taken away, it’s easy to feel like you're at his mercy. Just hang in there. I promise it will be better soon. These days (and nights) are really long, but they will go quickly. And, it may be hard to believe, but you'll likely long for the days of just holding him all day, just relishing his skin and little breath and holding his little hand.